Service vs Care?

We live in a world of endless services, but limited care.

You can pay for just about anything and have it delivered to you in an instant. But we've all but lost the kind of support that collectively allows us to soften to the touch. To relax. To breathe a little easier.

Moving through a transactionally driven world hardens us. By design, a world of servicing gets the job done but keeps us on edge.

So much so that when someone goes out of their way to delight us, it's disarming:

A friend who arrives at your home with your favorite beverage.
A waiter who lingers in conversation to get to know you.
Receiving the perfect book from a neighbor.
A dessert platter on the house at your favorite restaurant. A handwritten note instead of an email.
Someone who lingers at a door just to hold itopen.
A compliment from a stranger.
A farmer's market vendor who lets you pay next week when you forget your cash.

Allow yourself to be disarmed.

When someone brings presence and care to a situation, soften into it. Breathe into the part of you that wants to brace or question, and let yourself be reminded how nice it is to be taken care of.

Turn that care inward

When these simple gestures surprise us, it's proof of a particular kind of crack in our culture. And what's worse is that it can be proof of a crack within how we treat
ourselves.

You might go from work to workout to manicure to massage, but are you simply servicing yourself or actually taking care?

Where are you servicing yourself simply because you think it will drive more efficiency, more productivity, more validation, more performance? Versus out of a genuine expression of self-respect and nourishment?

When we look closely, we might realize that we've optimized for the wrong thing. Maybe we wouldn't need as much servicing if we operated with enough care.

Servicing keeps us in a loop of needing more. Care satiates. It creates connection. And loyalty. There is so much joy to be gained from pouring into someone with pure generosity. We don't realize we're starved for it.

As you move through your day, just notice - where might be accepting servicing, where what you really yearn for is care? Care expands the world we live in, our experience of it, and what we give to others. It moves us from transactionality to generosity.

Generosity fuels reciprocity

We can't demand care from one another, but we can be the ones to initiate the cycle.

Something is quietly triggered when you receive an act of care — your cup fills, and you become more willing to pour from it. Generosity fuels reciprocity.

Reciprocity of care removes the tension between me and you, and mine and yours.

It keeps us centered, grounded, and whole - and quietly heals the world.

Lori